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Good Communications Skills for Relationships
Good Communication techniques such as open ended statement will change your communication skills with practice and patience. You will see that things in your relationship will change. Don't make the mistake of giving up easily, it will take time to get use to the open ended statement, a new way of communication with your lover, mate or spouse.
Open ended statement:
Example: "When you don't answer my questions, I feel you don't care."
Cause: "You don't answer my questions."
Effect: "I feel you don't care."
Putting these two together will help you have better communication. The statement is clear and non-blaming. There is no finger pointing.
Example: "Take care of the kids today. I'm really tired."
Cause: "Take care of the kids today.
Effect: " I'm really tired".
With this statement you are not stating that he doesn't watch the kids and that you don't have time to rest. You are not pointing fingers or putting blame on the other party. Its clear and non-confusing and the message gets across directly. Your partner will watch the kids or take them out. In other words don't use questions, instead use open ended statements to your partner. It's non-controlling.
Example question statement: "Will you take the kids out? So that I may get some rest."
The open ended statement is not a question.
Next the tone of your voice makes a difference as well in your communication. There are several tones of voice:
1. blunt 2. bitter 3. cold 4. subtle and 5. calm.
Using blunt, bitter, cold tones will get negative results. Something you don't want and this is not what you want to obtain.
Using subtle, and calm tones will get the positive results that you are seeking in communication. Positiveness.
Remember yelling gets you no where, it gets you ignored or blocks communication, and defences going up or building up.
Next: Pick the right time to approach your mate with communication. Don't converse when he or she is entering through the door when he or she comes home. If you do, expect to be ignored.
Wait until your partner is open to be approached. Try dinner time, and give him or her time out or a couple of hours to get settled in the residence or home before conversing.
Don't converse when your mate is tired. If you do you will be ignored. Your mate will be more open when she or he is in a relaxed state. Maintain an atmosphere of relaxation in the home (with music, or other soothing devices or technology).
If you have tried all and feel there is not a solution to improve your relationship with your partner through communication or counselling its time to seek a Good Psychic for advice.
Re-evaluate your relationship, then move on with your life.
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